It is common to feel stuck in life at some point or other – to feel as if you are in a rut, and simply cannot move forward. This feeling limits you, stripping the motivation and joy from all that you do. What is worse is that often the obstacles in our way appear invisible, and it can be a frightening feeling knowing you have to fight against something you are struggling to properly identify. However this situation is far from hopeless – despite it feeling that way at the time.It is common to feel stuck in life at some point or other – to feel as if you are in a rut, and simply cannot move forward. This feeling limits you, stripping the motivation and joy from all that you do. What is worse is that often the obstacles in our way appear invisible, and it can be a frightening feeling knowing you have to fight against something you are struggling to properly identify. However this situation is far from hopeless – despite it feeling that way at the time.
One of the first steps towards releasing yourself from this feeling of stalling is to clearly identify how you would prefer your life to look, and what specific things are currently holding you back. We have put together an exercise to break down this process for you over the page – when completing this please allow yourself time and space to properly consider each answer, and write down everything that passes through your head while you’re thinking. Sometimes it takes seeing something written down – and out of the safety of our heads – for us to fully acknowledge certain thoughts, fears, feelings and desires. By creating the lists for this exercise you are also more likely to take action, as this act of pinpointing and making a feeling tangible induces a sense of accountability.
Step One: Write out a VISION OF YOUR IDEAL LIFE, including work, relationships, living situation and self.
Some questions to consider are:
• How many hours would you like to work every week?
• What would your ideal job role entail?
• How would you like your romantic relationship to look – is there a lost spark you’d like to revive, would you handle conflict differently or do you want more time to spend together?
• How about your relationships with family and friends?
• Where would you like to live and how would you like your living space to look?
• What would you like to do for fun/ life balance?
• Are there any hobbies or experiences you would like to try, or pick up again?
• Would you like to travel? If so, where?
• How would you like to feel every day?
• What feelings (both physical and emotional) that you currently experience would you like to get rid off?
Step Two: Identify what is holding you back from this ideal
Now that you have identified your desires in life, it is time to identify what is currently getting in your way of feeling and achieving these things. Put aside any feelings of judgement, blame or guilt when considering these factors, and be as truly honest as possible.
•List the things that you feel are holding you back from achieving this ideal life. Then, from this list, identify the top 3 things that are standing in your way.
Now that you know what they are, you can begin to think about how to tackle them – and take practical steps to move closer to your ideal image. The act of moving forward might seem more achievable already, simply as a result of focusing your thoughts on yourself in this way. Completing this exercise will also give you the motivation needed to begin to ease yourself out of your stuck feelings, and to tackle those tangible issues that have been keeping you in that rut.
Keep a hold of the lists you have constructed, and refer back to them regularly. Update them as you progress, and as your priorities and struggles change. You will feel boosted by seeing a record of your progress, and realise that moving forward can be done. You need only rely on yourself to take back control of your own life.
This article has been taken from the Spring Issue of Harmonizing Life.
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